


Pomegranate Lipstick and Sharp Teeth

by brionypoisoned



Category: The Penumbra Podcast
Genre: An absentee cock facilitator if you will, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Enthusiastic Consent, Other, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn with Feelings, Vespa being the opposite of a cock-block, they just love each other so much
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-22
Updated: 2020-01-22
Packaged: 2021-02-27 09:26:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,934
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22354810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brionypoisoned/pseuds/brionypoisoned
Summary: Just some smut between two cute dumbasses who love each other and do crimes. This one's a hard E, folks.
Relationships: Peter Nureyev/Juno Steel
Comments: 18
Kudos: 185





	Pomegranate Lipstick and Sharp Teeth

Juno Steel stuggled to keep his grip on the base of Vespa’s hovercopter, which was hovering about 30 feet above the Ecliptical System Pharmacological Initiative building, his foot hooked into a rung of a lengthy rope ladder. The roar of the engines almost drowned out the alarms blaring up from the roof below them, but not quite. With a lurching sensation Juno felt the hovercraft buck up a few more feet.

“VESPA, STOP GOING HIGHER! RANSOM’S STILL IN THERE!” Juno shouted into his comms, squinting through the wind and the water streaming from his eye for a glimpse of Nureyev. 

“It’s bad for the ‘copter to stay this low! We need to accelerate or I’ll lose total control of this thing!” Vespa growled in response from the cockpit. 

“Take it for a spin around the park,” A deep, confident voice addressed them through the comms. “I need a few minutes anyway.” 

“PETER!” Both Vespa and Juno shouted into the comms. He hadn’t checked in with them since at least a half-hour ago, before the alarms started going off. 

“I’ve got the hard drive and a good lead, but am unfortunately compelled to use the stairs. The alarms must lock down the elevators. I will be but a moment.”

“You reckless… you went back in for it?” Juno’s voice broke as he yelled at Nureyev, but at that point Vespa took her opportunity to pick up some momentum and Juno found himself preoccupied. His grip on a slim metal safety rail was the only thing preventing him from plummeting into the darkness. Once the hovercopter drifted away from the 60-story Initiative building roof he had a vertigo-inducing view all the way down to the streets below. As Juno Steel always said, fuck heights, man, like, for real. 

“Almost… there… God, stairs, what a concept, right?” Peter muttered into the comms.

“I’m coming around from the Southwest, Peter, get ready.” Vespa hissed, and Juno felt the hovercopter once again shudder forward at high speed. “Juno, drop the ladder.” 

“It’s been dropped, Vespa, you think I didn’t drop the fucking ladder?” Juno griped.

“Shut up, Juno.” Vespa responded, and with a little vindictive jolt sped the hovercopter up another few notches. 

At that though, Juno spotted Nureyev, emerging from a roof exit. His dark jumpsuit blended into the darkness, making him almost impossible to follow, but the gold chain earring decorating the exterior of his left ear glittered in their headlights.

Nureyev glanced back at the approaching vessel and began to run ahead of it to get his momentum up. He ran smoothly, beautifully, no hint of panic, like he was just gently hurrying to catch a train. Juno watched, rapt, as Vespa overtook Peter and he gracefully leapt from the roof and took hold of the rope like a dancer. The second Nureyev connected with the vessel Vespa took off at full speed, and about 50 police officers flooded out of the roof exits. They all began to fire their blasters at once, and Juno fired back. That scattered them a bit, until they could get some distance from the roof. Juno struggled to put his blaster away while keeping his grip on the safety rail, and glanced down to where Nureyev was slowly, carefully, climbing up the rope ladder. The rope twisted in circles above the rapidly receding ground, spinning the thief around with it. Juno’s heart stopped as he watched. 

Nureyev looked up at Juno like nothing was at all the matter, made eye contact, and _winked_. White teeth shone sharp behind pomegranate red lipstick, which wasn’t even smudged. Juno, for all of his adrenaline and fear, could only shake his head. What a man.

When Nureyev finally made his way up to the base of the hovercraft, Juno had a strong enough position to take his arm and pull him inside. Juno held Peter to him as they scrambled away from the opening, below which was just empty air. Through the door they could now see a clear nighttime view of colorful city lights set to the rumbling music of hovercraft engines. 

“Well that was exhil-“ Peter started, but Juno didn’t let him finish, kissing him almost desperately. Peter, so incredibly strong and acrobatic a moment earlier, melted into Juno like soft butter, kissing back with a pleasant little noise from his throat. 

“For the love of… guys the comms are STILL ON.” Vespa growled. 

“Sorry…” Juno muttered, fingers fumbling as he tried to press the right button to turn his comms off. Peter stifled shaking laughter by pressing his face into Juno’s chest. 

~*~

Back on the Carte Blanche Vespa abruptly stopped her two compatriots right outside Buddy’s office. Buddy had asked them to report to her about the mission as soon as they came back. Vespa sighed deeply, glancing at the still trembling Juno and windswept Ransom.

“Ransom, if you give me the hard drive, I can make our report with Buddy on my own. If you two need to…” She made a face. “Go somewhere. To… rest.” 

Juno glanced at Nureyev, whose lipstick was at that point beyond smudged. Peter began to fumble through his pockets for the hard drive, which he practically threw at Vespa in his haste.

“Thank you Vespa, you are truly a benevolent deity! A goddess!” He said, steering Juno away down the hallways towards their rooms.

“Yup sounds great to me, Vespa!” Juno called back, allowing himself to be steered.

“Shut the fuck up.” Vespa said to the retreating sounds of boot heels against metal floors. 

~*~

Nureyev’s mouth pressed warm kisses against the back of Juno’s neck as Juno struggled to unlock his own bedroom door. 

“Jesus… give me… a goddamn second” Juno complained, but his heart wasn’t really in it. The moment his door slid open he dragged Nureyev inside with him and pulled him in for a kiss, gripping the sides of Nureyev’s face and running his hands through his hair. 

Nureyev kissed back with intensity, pulling Juno closer in by his hips and stroking the shorter man’s lower back. Juno gasped as Nureyev took a firm grasp of his ass. Nureyev smiled into Juno’s lips. 

“You’re so beautiful.” He whispered. 

“Don’t lie, Nureyev, not to me.” Juno responded, hands trembling as he undid the buttons on Nureyev’s jumpsuit one by one.

“Never.” Peter whispered, eyes half shut, cheeks flushed. “Say my name again.” He demanded, even more softly, slipping out of his clothes and kissing Juno’s neck. 

“Nureyev… Peter Nureyev.” Juno said with the most tender softness, running his hands up Peter’s soft skin, pressing his hips against Peter’s and letting out a little moan. “Peter Nureyev, I’d like you to fuck me.” He whispered in a low, vulnerable grumble. 

Peter grinned devilishly at that and reached down into the front of Juno’s pants, gripping Juno’s cock and stroking it from base to tip with his large, strong hands. Juno let out a little shudder and closed his eye, but Peter kept his open, pupils blown, taking in Juno’s blissed out expression. 

“I love you, Juno Steel.” Peter whispered, lowering slowly to his knees, removing Juno’s trousers, and taking Juno’s penis into his mouth with slow, deliberate care. 

“GOD.” Juno gasped, holding on to the desk behind him for support. Peter’s mouth was hot and wet and his tongue pressed with the exact right amount of pressure exactly where it was supposed to. Juno lost coherence for a few seconds. “Nureyev… fuck…” He whispered. 

Nureyev, with Juno well and aroused, began to stroke Juno’s wet dick with his hands again as he stood up. He bent Juno gently over the bed, and gave Juno’s well-shaped ass a little appreciative smack.

“You’re a beautiful Lady, Juno, I never lied about that.” Peter poured some lube on Juno and deftly pressed one finger inside, inspiring his detective to make a sharp intake of breath. “When I saw you hanging out of that hovercopter tonight I thought I could die right then and there, you were so lovely.” 

“Glad… glad you didn’t. Die, that is… _ah!_ ” Juno gasped as Nureyev stuck another finger in, curling them cautiously and hitting just where he knew Juno needed it. Juno let himself relax into the sensation.

“How are you, my love?” Peter whispered, stroking Juno’s skin and kissing his back.

“Nureyev, please…” Juno mumbled.

Nureyev generously applied some lube and returned to where Juno lay, breathing heavily, waiting on the bed. He entered Juno slowly, savoring the tightness. For a moment he stayed still, pressed fully inside, as Juno gasped at the sensation. 

“Nureyev.”

“Say it again.” Peter muttered.

“NUREYEV.” Juno growled.

Nureyev began to thrust then, in earnest, as Juno arched his back into him. For a while that was all there was, just heat and warmth and pleasure and movement. Juno tilted until the angle was right, gasping at each press against his prostate, leaning in to it. He could feel Nureyev’s sweat mixing with his, hear Nureyev’s little noises of pleasure. When Nureyev’s pace began to speed up, to become more desperate, Juno pressed back even more.

Nureyev came with a shudder of bliss, slipping out of Juno with a soft groan. Juno turned to face him with a smile, face flushed, body hot, and Peter lowered his still somewhat red lips to Juno’s erection. Juno lay back on the bed, back arching again, clutching the sheets as Nureyev used his hands and his mouth to pull a spectacular orgasm from him, spilling onto his thighs and the bedsheets. Peter wiped his mouth as he curled up into Juno’s arms, the two of them breathing heavily in time together, clutching each other tight. 

“Fuck.” Juno whispered after about ten minutes of comfortable silence. “We can’t keep doing this.” 

“You must be kidding.” Nureyev laughed. “It would be a crime If we _didn’t_ Juno, that was fantastic.” 

“We’ve got to start actually reporting to Buddy after a mission, this is getting ridiculous.” 

“Mm. Fair point.” Nureyev said, moving away from Juno for a moment and tilting his head thoughtfully. “Maybe she should give us an, um, an interval before-hand? 45 minutes?”

“Speak for yourself,” Juno replied, smiling wickedly, “I need an hour and a half.” 

“Oh DO you!?” Nureyev laughed, not a performative laugh, not one of his roles, a real, deep, amused laugh. 

“At LEAST.” Juno said, but any faux cockiness was undone by his sweet smile as he said it.

“Oh please.” Nureyev curled to his side and gave Juno a salacious look. “Give me 20 minutes with you in a broom closet and you’re _finished_.”

“I’ll take that bet.” Juno said, leaning forward into another kiss.

~*~

Vespa sat on her own across from Buddy in her office, trying to ignore the two empty chairs on either side. Buddy leaned forward on her desk, holding her face in her hands in exasperation.

“You can’t keep letting them get away with this, Vespa.” Buddy said. “This is a spaceship, not a brothel.” 

“Look, you heard the kissy noises on the comms.” Vespa growled. “It’s gross as hell. You don’t have to sit between them eye-fucking each other CONSTANTLY.”

“CRUDE! Vespa!” Buddy said, with a small startled laugh. 

“Besides.” Vespa continued, looking as bashful as it was possible for Vespa to look with her particular aesthetic. “I’d rather meet with you on my own anyway.” 

Buddy smiled a slow, teasing smile. The kind of smile she reserved for special occasions and special people. 

“Let’s discuss this later, shall we?” She asked, using her deep voice to its full potential.

Vespa snapped to attention.

“Yes ma’am.” She agreed.


End file.
